A Horrific Night

I really thought I was dying and was five minutes away from calling an ambulance last night. It was horrific.

I'm sitting down just watching YouTube, when suddenly I get awful pain under my ribs, on both sides. I managed to get to the toilet, but everything is stuck. Meanwhile, I have rising nausea, and every movement makes me feel like I'm about to vomit. While this is happening, I start sweating buckets, so I grab my water bottle and tip it over my head. Moving just this much makes both the pain and nausea worse.

Slight movement makes things worse, even breathing. I keep straining and straining, and I realise I have abdominal pain as well.

I start to feel dizzy and my vision blurs. I reach out and grasp my phone, causing more pain, believing I will need to call an ambulance, as I feel like I'm dying. I wonder if I have been poisoned by something I ate.

Finally, the 'stopper' clears, and then there is a rush, like my usual IBD episodes. The pain and nausea remain. I still feel unstable, i.e. fuzzy. I clean up and stumble across the hall to my bed with the fan on full blast. I'm still in pain; I know I will need to go back to the toilet soon, but I lie there resting, listening to the cold tap still running in the bathroom sink.

Then comes the rush with which I am familiar. I dash to the toilet, but I have grabbed a face towel and the bottle of water from beside my bed. All hell breaks loose. I dribble water over my head, behind my neck, down my back. My left hand and wrist stay under the running water. The pain under my ribs dampens a notch, but my abdominal pain shifts into focus. I still feel nauseated, but not to the point that I need to vomit; I think I have control over it.

Finally, I feel a little better. I clean up, go back to my bedroom and put on my dressing gown because now I am freezing; chilled. I go back and forth to the bedroom several times. After one session, I stand up, cough and realise there's been a release. I sit down again to clean and realise it is all liquid, i.e. blood. This is not good.

From then until now, it's been blood and blood clots.

I was awake until 4 a.m.

Upon waking, there is still a shadow of the pain below my ribs. My abdomen is sore, but not painful. Every toilet visit results in blood with clots. I am freezing despite it being warm for an autumn day. I am sipping water and have put some meal replacement drinks in the fridge because I know I won't be eating today.

I won't be participating in Trick or Treat tonight, as I am shattered and still not well. I am just not up to receiving kids at the door.